Sorry For My Stupidity

Dear Rie,

            Hi, how are you doing? Did you get the letter I sent you after; I received that Christmas card from you last April? Rinban Ito gave me your letter one day after Temple service, and we were wondering why you had sent it to the Temple instead of my home address. Why did you write me all of a sudden? Did you send me that picture of you and your Boyfriend to rub it in my face, that you have a Boyfriend now and that you moved away from Buddhism? I’m surprised that you were still in the USA, after all that time you were in trouble for not renewing your Visa.

            Do you remember how we first met? I still remember that day at Zenshuji right after you joined, when someone announced that you were looking for someone to teach you English in exchange for Japanese Lessons. I took you up on that offer and I had forgotten the fine print, which said that you were not looking for a Boyfriend.  I think it was my mistake to get too close to you. Since we became fast friends, somehow I think the reason why we got along so well together was that we shared the same birthday.  The more time I spent with you the more I fell in love with you. I didn’t even care about the age gap between us. You were beautiful for your age.

            Remember the time you were worried about your Visa ending and you wanted to stay in the USA and we were talking about faking being married so you can stay in the US. I guess that is what made me write you that letter, saying how much I liked you and asked you to marry me. I understand that is why you stopped talking to me and refused to see me anymore. When we went our separate ways, I thought that was it and that I would never hear from you again.  If you didn’t want a Boyfriend when we were friends, why now? Why did you bother sending me a picture and a card saying you converted to the Anglican Church? Why, did you want to hurt me more?

            Well, sorry for my stupidity,

            JEL

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